Alternatives to adoption

Since there is no such thing as an accidental adoption, it’s a given that by the time the process is started there’s been a lot of thinking about the ins and outs and whos and whats and wherefores. Other options for families should all be considered during the course of the decision-making process. Here are a few other ways a family can grow:

The old-fashioned way

There’s nothing second class about a family built through adoption, nor is any reflection on a child not brought into the mix the old fashioned way, but reproducing biologically one obvious alternative to adopting.

Although some families come to adoption via fertility issues, many decide to adopt in addition to or instead of making a baby.

The advantages and disadvantages of each scenario are too apparent, and too personal, to go into in any depth, so we’ll simply leave this as a freestanding alternative, assuming every family has examined possibilities and chosen what best suits.

Embryo adoption

Legal adoption of genetically unrelated embryos for implantation through IFV (in vitro fertilization) is coming up to thirty years in the realm of the possible for infertile women hoping to produce a baby from their bodies.

The process is neither guaranteed nor without controversy when successful, but if a woman is physically capable of carrying a child to term, it is an option.

The costs are high, the risks are great, and the issues are numerous, but as science advances and culture catches up with those advances this option may become even more attractive.

Surrogacy

“Surrogacy occurs when a woman who is not pregnant agrees to bear a child for another/others who will parent the child. What differentiates surrogacy from designated adoption - where pregnant and adopting parents connect with one another prior to the birth and make an adoption plan - is that the surrogate, the woman who will bear the child, is not pregnant at the time a surrogacy agreement is reached.”

A surrogate may or may not contribute to the genetic mix of the child, depending on the type of surrogacy chosen, but with no legal standards for the process this may not matter. If issues arise, and many that have are remembered for grabbing the headlines for months at a time as courts wrangled custody and huge amounts of money have been tossed around along with claims of ‘baby-buying’ and other unsavory slurs, untangling the treads of parenthood is a complicated process that someone must lose.

There are cases where this works wonderfully well, but when looking at this alternative, be aware that there will be very little protection for your money or your heart.

Other legal designations

Guardianship, legal custody and subsidized permanency are other legal designations that may be granted on behalf of children in circumstances where courts have are involved in establishing the best interests of the child.

Credits: Sandra Hanks Benoiton