What it costs

Folks are always going on about how expensive it is to have kids these days. They’re right.

There’s no getting away from money

When treading around the fringes of adoption, there may be a strong tendency to think in soft, cuddly terms all tinged in pastel shades of blue and pink. An army of warm fuzzies may be strategically positioned to intercept salvoes of harsh reality’s overtones, but there’s one barrage of cold calculations you must deal with hand-to-hand: the money.

It seems a thin line, the wobbly footbridge between buying a baby and paying for services related to adoption, but although it may seem fragile, it is stronger than titanium and does not take to manipulation.

State to state, laws clearly define what is and what is not to be paid, and whether your adoption is through an agency or private someone involved must thoroughly and completely understand everything that has anything to do with the process in your area, and any other state involved if you’re adopting across state lines. People with this skill and knowledge charge for their services, and often they charge a great deal.

Does it matter?

As in, “Does it matter how much money you have?”
No.
And yes.
You don’t have to be rich to adopt a child, but as in most aspects of American life, it sure doesn’t hurt. Being in a position to throw money at your adoption might speed up the process, may jump you to the head of the queue, or could make you more attractive to placing parents.

This is not to say that folks on budgets won’t be matched quickly or chosen before others with more disposable income … there are no fixed timetables, nor are there crystal balls … so although you may be hoping your ship comes in, there’s no reason to wait until you’ve met it at the port to add to your family. If you are able to provide for a child adequately ... food, shelter, clothing education, health-related services, love, time … you have enough of the worldly goods to adopt a child.

Notice the key word is adequate. No one is requiring lavish or extravagant, so you should suffer no worries about space camp or Oxford, or having to upgrade your home computer every six months to keep Junior on the cutting edge, and although it may be de rigueur to dress tykes in $200 togs, it is most certainly not required.

Coming up with the cash

Very often, the most impressive splashing out of cold hard cash comes long before you start queuing up for the latest version of PlayStation … it’s the adoption itself that may cost the moon.

With US Domestic Infant adoption costs running between $5000 and $40,000 … some even more … there are many families hoping to grow this way that do some deep and creative thinking over how to muster the finances to match the need.

Loans and second mortgages are one way to turn assets into a usable form, and if there’s a high limit on a credit card, that can work, too.

Taking on more work, contract jobs or part-time positions, may add enough to the coffers to fund an adoption, or perhaps simply cutting back on luxuries or holiday spending can do the trick.

Turning to friends and family is a tactic that works for some families, and aside from bringing in the needed resources this can also involve a wider loving circle in your process and have you walking your adoption journey with a large audience following each step and shouting encouragement from the sidelines.

You can even set up a special baby fund and have your loved ones contribute. There are some organizations that will set up an account for you that lets others make tax-deductible donations.

Special projects, artwork, books, crafts, all have been made use of as saleable items in bids to raise money for adoptions. One woman made beautiful baby-sized quilts and sold them on eBay, eventually ending up with so much more than her adoption required that she put the extra into an account that will go toward covering costs for a second child.

For more ideas and information, check out Adoption.com’s page titled, “Raising money for adoption.”

Credits: Sandra Hanks Benoiton